Beer Profile: Sheaf Stout

Ok, you're not going to find Sheaf on the Beer Advocate Top 100. But if you're scraping the ashtray and just got to have a dark and nasty stout, this is your cheap corner fix. Aboriginal dark and mischievous like the outback horizon, Sheaf has a sharp, burnt taste with just a little chocolate sweetness to cut the bite. It is light on the mouth for a stout - the 5.8% ABV doesn't have the luxurious texture that some of its imperial cousins feature - but the positive there is that it is eminently drinkable in larger quantities and its cheap pricing (I really dig the twist-off caps!) make buying an armful a distinct option. You can only imagine that if the alcohol level were any higher, there would be heaps of 'blokes' beating the cr*p out of each other up and down the land of Oz.

What Sheaf really says though is rock-climbing. Drinking Sheaf just goes well after a day of jangled nerves and quivering forearms. And as a matter of fact, Sheaf is somewhat iconic in the climbing world due to an infamous photo of John "The Vermin"Sherman taking a big slug from a bomber of Sheaf while climbing high off the ground ropeless in flip-flops. 

Some genius in a sh*t-hole convenience store in the Mojave Desert knew about the picture, and he started selling Sheaf to dirtbag Joshua Tree climbers and I ended up with an exuberant and devoted taste for dark and nasty beers. Sheaf Stout - along with Guinness and Henry Weinhardts Blue - were my introduction to stouts back in the '80s.

And now Sheaf Stout has miraculously reappeared here on shelves at sketchy liquor stores around the Bay Area. Ideal pairings include those sick little Vietnamese donuts or a Snickers bar, after an afternoon bouldering session at Indian Rock of course to offset caloric intake.These are wonderful times indeed for beer lovers!

BeerFit Homebrew Tip #1 - Get the dogs in to help out!

You pick up any homebrew manual, and the first thing they'll blab on about is the need to get the pets out of the house, vacuum up any dog hair, etc... Baloney, dogs are great morale support and they always keep the focus on staying entertained. After a good trail run today, we had a muy gordo burrito and an Alaskan barleywine before doing some bottling. Here's Clyde doing his best to help out and stay BeerFit!

BeerFit Athlete Interview: Laura Spain

BF: So Laura, thanks for joining us here at the Trappist tonight. Let's jump right in, what the heck is an ultrarunner?
LS: Ultra distance runs are longer than marathons.
BF: Holy crap! What's the farthest you've run?
LS: 100km, 62 miles, done it a few times.
BF: Wow, I'd feel good about drinking a lot of beer after a run like that. What did you drink after that race? 
LS: Lagunitas makes a special Pale Ale for the Miwok 100K, so I had a few of those!
BF:  Simple question, Why do you run?
LS: I hate that question.
BF: OK, what do you get out of running?
LS: Time to myself, and most importantly a connection with nature and the outside world. I only run on dirt; no roads, so I'm always on a trail.
BF: How do athletics and beer combine to influence your lifestyle?
LS: Huh? Ummm, I guess two hours in to a long run, I'm pretty much thinking about food and beer; turkey sandwiches, double IPA, and advil keep me chugging along. That's pretty much my lifestyle I guess.
BF: What does "winning mentality" mean to you?
LS: What? I've never won anything so I don't know. Double IPAs and free shirts are my trophies, so I'm happy with those.
BF: Any advice for aspiring BeerFit athletes?
LS: Yeah, get out and hit the trail so you don't end up a lardass. Carbo loading is very real, and beer is carbs. Stock up and then burn it off.
BF: That's great advice. What's your favorite sports drink?
LS: That'd have to be Pliny the Elder.
BF: Thanks for joining us, I gotta run, I can feel that stout sloshing around in my gut. Later.

C.O.D. - The BeerFit way of Life.

The COD - "Compromise of the Day" - In the interest of offsetting caloric intake and justifying your obsession with hard to find and meticulously crafted ales, this is where you compromise your time by engaging in some sort of physical activity that stimulates your aerobic system. While necessary to maintaining some sort of reasonable physical appearance, I'd prefer to keep a real "glass half-full" outlook on this and point out that the COD should get you psyched up for beer. I don't really care (that much) about my waistline, but sweetjeebus that bomber of Imperial Stout just is more rewarding after a good trail run.

Today's COD is more cerebral; perhaps more about adrenaline than lactic acid:
Go out and find a big hill to skateboard down, look for one at least a few miles long if possible. Do it three times (what you'd call "reps" in a gym). Lose your breath walking up, and scare the crap out of yourself on the way down.

I'd say you've earned at least 3 Mammoth Epic IPAs for that workout!